The Rumors of My Demise Have Been Greatly Exaggerated

The Rumors of My Death Have Been Greatly Exaggerated

Hello all. As all of you probably noticed, the blog did not work out as planned. Sorry about that. I knew there would be a lot to do, but I never imagined there was that much. There were days that I would go on three different walking tours, skip lunch, and then go out that night. Before I forget, never go on three walking tours, skip lunch, and then go out at night. It ends badly. The people I met, with very few exceptions, were very nice and helpful. Such as the nice fellow I met at Oktoberfest. He had incredible incite into the American psyche and culture when he told me that Americans weren't smart. That's all he said. Americans aren't smart. OR the nice gentleman that came up to me IN THE BATHROOM at a restaurant said a “sentence” I'll never forget. “America very bad.” In vinos veritas I suppose. That is to say that he was inebriated enough to properly understand the complexities of the situation. Or he was drunk in public.

        There was the beer I had in Prague. It was incredible: Pilsner Urquell unfiltered and unpasteurized. Or the beer I had in Hamburg. It was... well it didn't cost much. I was invited to a wine festival in the Neckar Valley by my friend Frank. The wine there was really good. What was better was the two bottles Frank and I drank on the way there, but the best were the pictures the next day. They explained a lot.

        Also, my German improved considerably. For instance, at the airport before my flight home left, I spent three or four minutes looking at the menu before confidently stepping up and ordering in the clearest, most accent free German I could muster. The man behind the counter apparently approved. He smiled before telling me, “Ah, very good order!” Oh well, in all honesty my German really did get better. I was able to read some of the inscriptions on the memorials and understand some signs. Towards the very last month I was even able to make out words and phrases in conversation.

        Ok, these were mostly bad, but I promise it was the most incredible thing I've ever done. Every day I did something I’ve never done before and saw something I've never seen before and didn't know existed the week before. I walked around a castle that was approximately five times older than my country, but it was 50 times older than the country it was in. Every week I ate food I couldn't pronounce and met people from everywhere, literally everywhere: Israel, Germany, Amsterdam, South Africa, the Czech Republic, Australia, Great Britain, Canada, Switzerland, France, Bulgaria, Serbia, Italy, Belgium, New Zealand, Spain, Russia, Scotland, Ireland, Brazil, India, Mexico, Argentina, South Korea and of course America.

        I wrote a few entries on some of the cities I went to and I'm planning on writing a few more. Will they be a pointless exercise in self indulgence? More than likely. But I'm going to post them for a sort of diary so I can remember everything before I lose it in my old age. You can read them but only if you agree to tell me how smart and cool I am. Later.

P.S. Midnight in Paris is interesting but sucks. And I never got to see Captain America.